Everything you do in this planet of ours comes back to you. It is called karma they say. So what is karma, do you really understand what karma is? I wish I could tell you all the things I know, but I cannot, I don’t think you would believe me. I will give you the easy version about karma instead, because I don’t think you are ready for the difficult version.
I once worked with things ment for something else, in benefit of the users the American company specified the function to us. Simply we belived in it. My colleagues invented it and I was testlead and then I also got to test exactly that function. They patented the function and it was integrated to every laptop and phone in the world. My karma is in this function. I layed my hand on those electronics through software. Everything anyone does with these functions, that I worked with, comes right back to me. It is karma. It lingers all around everything you ever put your hands on and it comes right back to you. People do good things with these things and they do bad. When this is unbalanced in all the things I sat in motion, the bad karma hits me right back. It’s not what I do. It is what other’s do with what I helped with. My karma was invested in it and then it went out to the world. Never thought about this when I worked with it, even though I always belived in karma. We didn’t do bad things… but other’s did that with our things. I worked with satellites and terristerial and cable products also. They send TV… you know that can be bad and good too. Even in those technologies my part of this big puzzle called the universe comes right back to me. When that is unbalanced it comes back to me. So our karma lingers in all the things we did. Everything. So even if you think you are good, like I, what you did connects to the rest of this planet. We are in a eco-system, even karma. It gets back to you. Therefore I interfere, try to compensate the bad with the good. I am so tired of having bad karma. I had bad karma all my life. All of it, even the day I was born. I have bad karma, it lingers around me. What my steph father did, my teacher did to me, it reflects opon me and my insecurities. How I am, this reflects on others in how I am towards them and so it goes on. Everybody lingers in karma and connects to everyone else. So even if you don’t do bad, your karma exstends you and the karma gets back to you. I should never have moved to Stockholm. I don’t belong here. Karma told me. I perhaps don’t even belong with my partner, since I seem to have so bad odds hanging around my partner, but I stay, because my partner gets suicide tendences as soon as I mention I will leave my partner in moments when it actually believes me. Most of the time it says I won’t, how would I manage(that makes me feel pretty useless, like I cannot afford to live on my own right now). I cannot live with any strange affects from me leaving my partner, if it would result in my kid not having my partner as a parent. It is enough my partner never had more than one biological parent. They are both orphans in a way. My partner lost one of its parent as a baby. Our child lost contact with its birth parents, so now we are the parents. So, I feel I have to stay, even though this town tries to flush me out. I also wanna be elsewhere. I don’t really like this town. When I was about to divorce and all papers where handed in. My life got good karma. I got a job offer at a job I had and so on. But I chose to stay and then got another offer in Stockholm and I took the job offer and went back to my partner and my life turned from heaven to hell again. I should never have taken that job. It is where I met the phsycopat boss. When I took my partner back my bad karma was back. I am thinking what is karma telling me? This is my life, I shouldn’t be in Stockholm, perhaps not even in this very long relationship either. I shouldn’t live in Stockholm. I shouldn’t have moved to Stockholm. I shouldn’t have worked with that company. We all make mistakes when we get to look back in the rear mirror. I am in the wrong town. I had the wrong job. What should I do to regain a good balance and a good karma? I should make you understand what you do with technology, reflects on all the techies that worked with it. Everything you do reflects on you and OTHER’s, not just you. That is karma. I hope you now understand not everything is in our control. We need to make it ours. I am trying to cut the cord to the old karma. I really am trying. My soul wasn’t part of the deal. My soul wasn’t part of any deal for any job and never will it be part of any deal. Some can lure karma, but… it will find you somehow, one day. Don’t play with karma.